Also I'm listening to the new The National album right now. It is incredible. So a big thanks to NPR for streaming it. And I thought the government never did anything right.
So today I'm supposed to be working on putting together a support letter for the summer. I really don't want to write a support letter or to mail it out. I didn't do it last summer and I planned on not doing it this summer but my mom kept bothering me and I felt really bad. Eventually I have just decided it is better for me to honor her and to make her happy than to hold to my reasoning for not.
Which my reason for not writing a support letter is because I feel like if you want to make a commitment to be a servant and you don't have other people you are responsible for you shouldn't be asking for handouts because "your doing something good". I just felt like "hey, I can afford this, yeah I will have to make some sacrifices but that was a big part of it right?" To sacrifice time and money to serve the Lord. Honestly one of my biggest pet pevs is high school students raising thousands of dollars to go overseas to spend 10 days site seeing and working for 2 days. I just think it might as well say "Support me so I can go have a life changing experience/ give me X thousand dollars so I can be changed"
I didn't do this so I could go have fun for a summer or push of responsibility and I know part of the reason was for me to be changed. I chose to come back to Eagle Lake because I felt like God lead me there and opened lots of doors for me to be there. I wanted to respect that and follow God's lead. I don't desire to be rich, I desire to serve my father and experience his love more fully. This is why I didn't want to send support letters and why I feel so uncomfortable doing it. But God is good and I'm honoring my mother through this.
Coffee makes me crazy.. I can't handle to much caffeine (SP? Really That is not an easy word to spell.... for me) I think the caffeine buzz is actually starting to subside though, which is good, I can finally focus a little bit.
I had breakfast with Corey this morning, that was so good to catch up. We have really struggled to stay in touch. It was actually a really hard adjustment for me because in high school I relied on Corey so much. He really discipled me in the complete sense of the word. He lived life with me, we got coffee or lunch almost weekly and I constantly went over to the k-life house to see him. I had another guy at northwestern who started to mentor me but then I transfered. Anyways I'm sending Corey my blog address soon so. (HI COREY). I will keep writing like he won't read this though. I am hopeful that if I move back to Des Moines he will start discipling me again. That would be amazing.
Well Doyle just walked in and we are going to play basketball so I have to go.... More to come later. Good talk
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