Slam your first against the table!

“The chief cause of failure and unhappiness is trading what you want the most for what you want now.” Zig Ziglar Wow what an incredible quote. When I read this it just rang so true for me and my life. How often has what I wanted in the moment kept me from staying on the course toward what I truly wanted, how many times have I said I was going to loose some weight and get in shape and then I had a momentary want for unhealthy food? Or a momentary desire to not exercise because I was tired in the moment? I believe that people who have this perspective are often people who are truly happy and successful or are more likely to be. The people that consistently overcome momentary desires in order to achieve a longer term goal or accomplishment are the people that get where they want to go in life. It is kind of amazing to me how good I was at doing this for sports. I don’t enjoy working out or two-a-days or lifting and there were many days I didn’t want to do those things but I had an iron clad commitment to the goal of being a better athlete and making my team better because of it. I was also very passionate about sports and enjoyed sports. I think the lack of passion is what made school so difficult for me. I was seldom passionate about what I was studying and I didn’t have the long term commitment to getting good grades so I could get a good job… etc. I’m trying to figure out what the driving forces in my life are and how to harness those driving forces. I have a desire to be successful and that is what motivates me day in and day out to try to become better. Maybe even more than a desire to be successful I have a fear of being of successful. I have a strong sense of fear that I could waste my life. I am afraid of looking when I am old and thinking I wasted my time. So is that the driving force in my life, or one of them that will cause me to overcome obstacles or persevere through difficulties and achieve the things I desire? Maybe that isn’t the best driving force or maybe that is only one of many. I think perspective can be a driving force. When you are able to put things into perspective it helps you to make decisions that are based on long term desires or true desires instead of temporary desires. I believe goals help with perspective and help to be a motivator and that I was I am committed to making, tracking, discussing, tweaking and ultimately achieving my goals. But to find real joy in life I believe that passion can not be removed from the equation. It makes sense doesn’t it? I believe we were created by the Creator and given talents and passions or tendencies towards certain things. And it brings glory to God when we use our talents and passions to the fullest. Let me preface that last part about passion. Last night I was at K-life and Ric was giving a message but we were also supposed to discuss some of the topics he was bringing up. Well one of his points that struck me was “What are you passionate about?” which then we were asked to discuss in our small groups and Dana asked me to kick it off. I quickly created some answer while I was trying to figure out my real answer that sounded something like “well, I am passionate about progress, the process of becoming better at things, I’m also passionate about relationships and continuing do grow and deepen the relationships that I have been blessed to have in my life. I am also passionate about my faith.” I don’t know why but I felt very fake during my answer, I don’t necessarily think that the things I said were untrue but I think I was just still very unsure of what I thought. Ric used the analogy of “what makes you slam your fist against the table? What gets you so worked up that you would slam your first against the table” Honestly my instant reaction while I was thinking was nothing. I started trying to think of things hoping something would just pop into my head and nothing did which made me think nothing. But I know that isn’t true. So on the drive home I continued to think about this idea of “What makes you slam your fist against the table?” To be honest I’m still very much wrestling with my answer, as well as the guilt that my initial response wasn’t “The advancement of the Kingdom of the Lord.” Since that wasn’t my answer or even an answer that feels real right now I’m stuck with the why. Why don’t I feel that way? Do I want to change that? How do I develop that passion? Can I develop that passion? That is a lot to think about and I don’t want to get to removed from my starting point. So what are the things in my personal life that make me slam my fist against the table? I’m going to pause here because I’m going to spend some time considering my answer and write a follow up blog. So I guess the most logical ending is to ask “What makes you slam your fist against the table?”

goals

Cheers to something new! I have never tried blogging from my phone before. Sitting in a panera, like I havo fir so many previous posts. Honestly. I am pretty sure the ratio would be pretty ridiculous to see. Anyways I am waiting for a friend who I have been meeting with for over a month now. We stated meeting weekly to discuss goals. It has been a slow process of getting together for coffee or dinner and discussing goals as well as life in general. It is sort of a time for us to process each week together and then discuss the future by creating and working in our personal goals together. When we were discussing the idea of doing goal setting and accountability together I started doing some research on goalsetting techniques. And strategies. At first it was a little intimidating, it was also motivating. But goal setting is intimidating because you are making decisions in what is important to you, what you think your life could be like/ what you want it to be like, how much you expect/ desire from yourself and your life. I felt like goals took a different meaning for me when I started putting them down on paper. Honestly at that point it is just you staring at something you have decided you want to do, experience, or become. That is very real. Goal setting has made me take a hard look at what I believe about life and the things that I want out of my life. It honestly made me think I am a pretty selfish person but hopefully this will inspire growth. Goal setting also puts your failures right in front of your face. When you say your going to do something and you get to the point that you said you would do it by and have not done it, that can be defeating. Of course you can't allow "failures" to compromise the journey of achieving your goals. I have to refocus myself when that happens and make sure I get baxck on track as soon as possible. Well my friend is here. More on this journey later.

Intern

Well I am over a month into my internship (Crazy). So far I have enjoyed my time in Des Moines, it has been very busy with catching up with old friends, moving into my house, and work. I feel like I have mad pretty good progress in getting into a rhythm. I feel like I have been maturing a lot by accepting more responsibilities and expecting more from myself.

Let me quickly summarize where I am what. I graduated May 7Th, moved to Des Moines and started an internship with Principal. I moved into one of my former college roommate's house that is very very nice. I have 4 other roommates and it has been a pretty good experience so far. I spent a pretty good amount of my first month trying to hangout with my best friend Tommy because he just left for New Mexico for a month and then will be moving to Virginia for law school. I'm thankful we got to spend some time together.

As well as things have been going I still feel like something is missing. It might be my lack of involvement with a church since I have moved to Des Moines, it might be that I am living in Des Moines again and not somewhere new. Honestly I am not exactly sure what it is but I do not feel content or satisfied. I think part of it is my roommates are not as motivated as I would like them to be or maybe just not as interested in things outside of work, golf, and hanging out watching tv.
I graduated college and I have a serious hunger to try to do some new things. I have this serious thirst to learn new things. I want to get into biking, learn how to make cocktails, read tons of books, get involved with volunteer organizations, I would love to try to do a sprint triathlon, I want to learn how to cook, I'm 23 I don't want to slow down, I want to speed up. I'm not ready to settle down and accept where life is at, why would you want that? I feel like I'm looking for some community that is as excited to get after life as I am. I want to spend time with people that are going to push me and are open to me pushing them. I want more depth too, I want to sit out on the back porch and have real honest conversations, not spending two hours bullshiting and talking about sports. Yesterday my friend ryan and I went on a bike ride from the surburbs into downtown Des Moines. We stopped at a restaurant down town where we had some tacos and margaritas. I had a blast it was one of the best days I've had so far in Des Moines. We biked about 20 miles and just had a good time hanging out.

Honestly I think I just need a fresh start and new city. To many of my friends that live here are comfortable, I'm far from being comfortable.

Group Project

So I'm currently at the tail end of working on a group project and it has been tough. We are competing in a development competition in Minneapolis with 4 other colleges. Basically the committee running the competition gives us a piece of land in our case an 18 acres site in one of the Minneapolis suburbs and we are supposed to come up with a development proposal for the site.

Well this started in early February and we have meet at least once a week since. I was involved in this same competition last year and it was completely different. First of all I think last years project was significantly easier. We had the opportunity to choose to one, two, or all three parcels and come up with a development plan for each. We chose to only do one and we only had one building on it. This year we are proposing at least 6 and we have to come up with a construction schedule and costs for each and then a financial pro-forma and other financial information. Anyways last year we also had six guys working on it and we were all pretty committed and we all had no idea what we were doing. We ended up doing pretty good, we got third but we think we got hosed ;).

So this year has just been completely different we have had 13 people involved and I have been put in a position of "leading" this group and it is like people wait for me to give them things to do and it is very frustrating. Also I would say there are like 2-3 of the people in the group who have actually put a significant amount of time into this project and the rest have put very little. The experience has definitely taught me a lot about group work. Being in a position to delegate is a tough position to be in. Its like you have to understand where the whole project is going and how to explain each part to each person. It is ridiculous how delegation seems like something that is so easy, I mean you just tell other people what to do right? It has been quite the journey and it has been very stressful. I can not wait for the project to be over. We have until Wednesday afternoon to get it finished and we have some major things to get worked out before then.

I have just been very stressed out with this project and am nervous about us getting it finished, So I thought that blogging about it might help a little.

Well hopefully we can make this thing fly in a few days :). I only have like forty more days till graduation, that is a solid positive to think about!

War

I'm pretty pessimistic. It is one of my many flaws I wish I was more easy going or just plain optimistic. But I tend to lean towards pessimism. I think most people struggle with perspective and I have been thinking about perspective a lot lately. Perspective is something that is difficult to maintain. I think it is because culturally "perspective" is where you land on the american dream or how you measure up to your peers in terms of success.

I'm reading Fly Boys by James Bradley which is about some airmen who fought in the pacific and became P.O.W.s in Japan during world war two. Most of the book as actually very appalling. War is something I can't even pretend to understand and I think is far to often read about in a way that isn't really attempting to understand it. It seems to me that far to often people read a line like "one hundred thousand american military, two and a half million Japanese and thirty million Chinese were killed in Japan's raid of China and the fighting in the pacific during world war two" and then continue to read on without being fazed. 30 MILLION PEOPLE!!!!! James Bradley has a chapter of his book devoted to Japans "rape" of China and it is horrific. The Japanese just killed everyone in sight when they attacked China. It isn't even the reading about "civilized" war that has been the tough parts to read but it is the sections that talk about different armies decimating civilians and the way that life was view by the different nations. I guess I have had such a sheltered life that it is hard for me to comprehend how the world hasn't stood together for peace. It is incomprehensible to me that nations have been brainwashed to believe that they are so damn different then each other and that other nations youth "deserve" to die. I apologize to anyone who reads this for my ramblings I'm trying to process as I type.

While I wrestle with the insanity of racism, ignorance, and inhumane violence of the world wars of history this book has helped me to adjust my perspective of my life and to be grateful for the environment I have been raised in and the opportunities I have had. If it was the early 1940's I would almost certainly be a soldier in the war or be dead. It is refreshing to take a step back from the mentality of looking at what you haven't achieved and what you don't have to be grateful for what you do have.

I'm not "officially" (Whatever that means ;) Participating in lent but I have been around some people that are and I have just decided for that for this season of lent/life I am trying to give up being ungrateful? I would've just said try to be more grateful but I'm pretty sure you are supposed to stop doing something for lent. This has been a very good thing for me to be challenged with during this season because I am in a season of uncertainty and stress. I feel as if I am on the brink of making some heavy decisions like what to do, where to live, what to devote time time and what things I'm trying to achieve in the next fews years.

Hard Decisions

So this Friday I will be exactly 8 weeks from graduating...... WHAT! Well actually 8 weeks of class so 9.

WHAT!!?!>1/.1/13./1./.3?.1/3.2/4.1/4./4??%7.4/YH


That doesn't even seem real. I have to enter the real world, which I must admit I am looking forward to but I'm also terrified. There are a few job opportunities I am deciding on whether to pursue or not and it is tough. Right now I have a "soft" job offer to be an appraiser in Des Moines, I am considering applying for an internship at Principal in Des Moines (Extremely Corporate), There is a company in Kansas City that has told me they are interested in higher me but they don't have any full time opening yet, and there is a company in Des Moines that has an opening for a sales agent in it's commercial brokerage office.

I'm going to break down where I am at for pros and cons of each.

Appraisal position

Cons: 1) Des Moines 2) Tough first two years to get started in the industry with lots of time spent doing continuing ed, classes, and passing some tests. 3) Since it has so many barriers to getting into it would be tough to leave. Also most people that get into appraisal and get their career going don't quick appraising. 4) I'm not exactly sure that this it is something I would be excited about doing all the time. 5) Doesn't necessarily have the suit and tie "top tier" professional requirement (Yes, I like that) 6) Des Moines.


Pros: 1) You have a lot of control over your career 2) Your work and experience adds a lot of value to yourself and you are not that dependent on the company you work for 3) There is a lot of flexibility with hours and where you work from (Potential to be on vacation somewhere and still get work done, also work from home or go into the office whenever) 4) Great opportunities for getting into coaching. 5) Could be fairly easy to relocate to another part of the country but not for 4-6 years. 6) Great opportunity to be an investor in real estate because I would be a pro at valuing it.

Brokerage position
Cons: 1) Potentially start on commission and make very little money for around 2 years. 2) Harder leave one market and enter another market. 3) Uncertainty of commission. 4) Des Moines.

Pros: 1) lots of control over career. 2) A lot of the work is developing your network. Which i think would be a lot of fun. 3) I have already set a pretty good base for a network in Des Moines 4) Not very dependant on one employer, your network and skills add a lot of value to yourself. 5) Potential to make LOTS of money 6) A good amount of flexibility with hours/vacation 7) I enjoy relationship managing. 8) I am not afraid of hearing no.

Internship

Cons: 1) It is an internship 2) Only guarunteed for 7 months 3) Ubber corporate (Split on if this is a con or not 4) Des Moines 5) Make nothing for 7 months.

Pros: 1) Huge Company with a strong brand name. 2) Better opportunity to relocate 3) Easier to go huge corporate then switch to smaller shop than the other way around.

Kanas City company

Cons: 1) Not sure I would like the company/position 2)

Pros: 1) KANSAS CITY 2) They also have an office in San Fransico 3) The company is headquartered in Chicago 4) Solid experience and probably pay to start out 5) Potential to move into mortgage banking (Middle man between borrower and lender 6) They could potentially open an office in Denver.


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I think it is pretty clear the winner is the position in Kansas City.

Hm, I have not actually decided I need to hear more about the brokerage and appraisal positions. Tough decisions. My ideal was to get to Denver but that has been harder than I thought it would be.

Well that is where things are at for now. It will be interesting to see how they change.

Tommy

Tommy is one of my heroes. I know how talented he is and who he really is as a person and I love him for that.

I still remember meeting Tommy. I was going into 5th grade and I had only been living in Des Moines for a few months. Tommy and I were in VBS together. I still remember the first time I ever hung out at Tommy's house, we spent hours talking about how much we loved star wars while we sat on the couch in his basement! We went to church together from that point until we graduated high school. Over the years we went through so many experiences together, we truly "grew up" together. I thought about listing all of the things we went through together or even just the significant ones and unfortunately I don't have the time.

I think there is something very special about experiencing someone through so many of life's changes. What is so amazing about our relationship is that you would think we would have so many similarities and tons of common interests but we have few. Our lives have taken very different paths. We have been calling each other "best friends" for years but the reality is we stopped being "best friends" years ago. Tommy is a brother to me.

I got to spend this past weekend with Tommy and I was reminded how blessed I have been to have such an amazing friend. I know that it won't matter if we live in the same city or on different sides of the country, we will always be there for each other and ready to do anything at a moments notice to help each other.

You're my guy Tom. Thanks!

The midst of a storm

I apologize if you read this. I was planning on putting together a post about how Dropbox.com is one of the most incredible and revolutionary Applications out there but my mind has just been bouncing around since the minute I walked in the door about a half an hour ago.

So please understand if my thoughts are fragmented and scattered. Which I think is do to A) Tiredness and B) Spending about 90% of the last two days studying or working on homework assignments. Which will not slow down until I finish my test on Friday at 11. YUCK!

Anyways I am actually getting used to the constant school work and unending group meetings. I think it is all about having the right mindset. When you have the right mindset it is amazing how much easier things feel? Its like if I am expecting to spend 8 hours in the library working on stuff it isn't that bad because I have resigned myself to that but if I am planning on spending two hours there and I just go in thinking about how I hope it goes by quickly it seems to drag.

So last night we had a real estate club meeting (The club I am the President of). Anyways we had an employer here from Kansas City and I have meet this guy multiple times before because of having him up for meetings in the past and I am the one who coordinates meetings. So I was looking forward to having him up he is real nice guy and I usual enjoy talking with him. Well after the meeting I was talking with him about this intership opportunity he had talked about that would be for 8 weeks starting right after I would graduate and I was telling him how I was interested and I was wondering what I should do next. At first he was like "oh yeah, okay" and he was just awkward when I was trying to ask him what I should do next after I gave him my resume. After a few minutes of these he goes "you know what this internship isn't really for you, this is for some people who don't have that much experience and we want to check out before hiring them full" and he went on to tell me that he and someone else had given me the thumbs up. He then continued to tell me they were just waiting for approval on some full time positions and that I was on their "top five" list of people to hire.

I hope that didn't come off as arrogant because I was really caught of guard by that and I just kept thinking "how did I get on their top five and how didn't I know that they were so interested". I mean it really makes me wonder like "Is this company honestly interested in me because I have meet this guy and a few other people from their company a half a dozen times". I mean all I have done is talk with them and organize meetings for the real estate club. I have not done anything amazing. Also what is so confusing is that my GPA is pretty weak like I feel pretty confident that I am a below average student. So is it really that easy, I mean is it more important to just have some familiarity and somewhat of a relationship?

Because if it is it makes me wonder what it would be like if you were just very cognizant about building your personal brand and building up as many relationships as you possibly could. Would you really even need to be that smart? or is that being smart?

There is this real estate grad student who is at a grad school in New York that created a blog titled 'a student of the real estate game". He is absolutely brilliant. I mean I he obviously works very hard but he has thought of a way to put himself in front of so many people in the industry. I guarantee that he gets a bundle of job offers because he has brilliantly marked himself and made himself considerably more valuable. Honestly IT IS RIDICULOUS! It is amazing how easy it is. You just put yourself out there and email/call people and ask if you can sit down with them and ask them questions to get advice. I would say I have opened up a solid three opportunities in Des Moines because of doing that and these people in control met me and know me by name. Amazing. Also the best part is you can talk with the stinking people at the top. It is amazing how easy it is to ask some president of a company to meet with you and it is almost like they think "well if this kid is asking me then it must be alright " WHAT!?!?

Honestly I'm blown away. If there is one talent I might have I think it is resourcefulness and the ability to just ask.

More to come later. Do more people know this? Is this one of those things that you think everyone would know but few people know?

"The answer is always no, if you never ask"

The hours leading up to a test....

I should be continuing to review my notes, I have a test in a few hours and I have class in 15 and I will be in class until my test (Well truth be told I'm going to skip one class to study :). But still I should be reviewing notes right now.

But i wanted to put down a quick blog post. I truly hate the hours leading up to tests, especially when you feel unprepared. Also I really really hate management classes. Management classes are just thick textbooks full of B.S. lists of definitions and lists. Ex. What are the 3 levels of strategic activity in a company? WHO GIVES A .... Not me! I seriously spend an absurd amount of time wondering if the Explicatives that write these text books and teach these classes actually think people can retain this incredible mountain of information. Or do they think that people will only retain 10% anyways so they just put an incredible amount together and they are satisfied with 10%. I mean there has to be a better way to teach this management. I can not be the only person that believes this. This is why I believe there are way to many professional professors in business colleges.

Anyways one there is one thing that I think is very interesting about the hours leading up to a test. I find myself thinking lots of interesting thoughts in the hours leading up to a test.. well nevermind time to go to class.

P.S. Grooveshark has changed my life.